


Throwing Away the Mask

by suitX6



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Lovers, Light Angst, Persona 5: The Royal Spoilers, Post-Persona 5: The Royal, Returning from the dead to give this pairing some much needed content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:48:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25180408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/suitX6/pseuds/suitX6
Summary: A few months have passed since the Day of Fates, and Ryuji has been thinking a lot lately about his plans for the future. Obviously, meticulous planning was never really his area of expertise, so with some prodding he enlists the help of the former analyst for the Phantom Thieves of Hearts. Y'know, the one he may or may not have a thing for. No big deal or anything.
Relationships: Amamiya Ren/Takamaki Ann, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Niijima Makoto/Sakamoto Ryuji
Comments: 2
Kudos: 47





	Throwing Away the Mask

**Author's Note:**

> WHOO BOY, I've recently finished P5R and what a game. What an absolute gem of a video game. A game that, playing through the fourth time around, made me notice that Ryukoto is a very underrated pairing that has some serious potential. It has become my guilty pleasure ship, and one that I need to add to the tag for by any means necessary. So enjoy!

“And it’s so easy to _say_ you’re gonna do somethin’, but then you start lookin’ and then you realize...shit’s easier said than done, right?”  
  
“Tell me about it! Some of these study abroad programs are super uppity about their standards. First a letter of rec, and now there’s all these tests? I thought the point was to encourage people to come out for these programs, not give them a reason to back out.”  
  
“Tch, sounds like a load of bull.”  
  
“That’s what I told Ren!”  
  
A low chuckle filled the air of his musty bedroom as Ryuji lightly thudded against his mattress, his phone almost sliding out of the palm of his hand with his harsh action. He stifled a yawn and checked the time before putting the phone back against his ear. His and Ann’s talks always managed to go for pretty long, but tonight’s in particular felt like it just couldn’t end. Not because the conversation dragged at all; far from it! If anything, there was _too much_ to talk about.  
  
The Day of Fates was five months ago today. The events that took place at the beginning of the year were a little fuzzy - no doubt due to the nature of the mastermind behind it all. He could still recall the vague details, though. How Dr. Maruki, someone each of his fellow Phantom Thieves confided in and bonded with, trapped them in a world of their hearts’ desires. How he betrayed the promises he made to his best friend by giving in. How Ren, understanding to a fault, set him back on the right path. How he fought the fight of his life with his brothers/sisters-in-arms to take control of their futures once more, pain and all.

And how right now, despite his best efforts, it’s proving to be a bit more difficult than he imagined in hindsight.

Ryuji had laid out his plans to his fellow ex-Thieves plain and simple: move back home, go through some physical therapy, potentially get back into track, _profit._ Simple, right?

If only it were that easy.

Firstly, moving back home was going to take time. Vacancies weren’t going to pop up right away. And even if they did, Ryuji and his mom aren’t in a great place financially to warrant entertaining the idea of a move. Couple that with future expenses for his rehab and track programs and...yeah. It all adds up.

So Ryuji’s plan was shot. Not sunken, but it would definitely take a lot longer than a couple months before he could put his plan into action. And he didn’t mind that! The boy never wanted to be a burden to his mother despite her protests. He could put his dreams on the backburner to ensure the wellbeing of his dear Ma.

At least, that’s what he told himself. But in the past month or so since he started mulling over his options, Ryuji was torn. Torn between wanting to throw caution to the wind and chase after his desires and resigning himself to a mediocre third year at Shujin. And in those moments of doubt and anxiousness, he’d find himself calling up Ann to just...let it all out. Be it his everyday concerns or the more existential worries that plague him to this day.

Normally? Ren would be his go-to guy for these sorts of problems. He was the leader of the Phantom Thieves for a reason, right? And yet, Ryuji could never bring himself to make the call. The Wild Card was undoubtedly busy getting settled into his hometown once more. And what kind of man would he be if he saddled his best friend with more crap?  
  
So Ryuji settled on the runner-up: Ann. Though, it was ultimately the better call at the end of the day to talk to Ann about these things. They were similar in more ways than they realize. He would probably never admit it, but Ann was sort of like the sister he never had. Yeah, the bickering was there, but their escapades in the Metaverse made the bond they shared tightly knit. Thick as thieves, just as they were in middle school.  
  
_Heh...wonder what middle school me would think about where I’m at now? Prolly would say I’m being super lame right now..._  
  
“Hellooooo? Ryuji, are you seriously spacing out on me right now?!”  
  
Crap. If there’s one thing he’s learned with these long talks with Ann, it’s that ignoring her is the absolute worst thing you could do. The faux blond sat up with a start, letting out a low groan when he picked the phone back up and put it on speaker.  
  
“Ugggggh, you get pissy so easily. Is it wrong to let a guy think once in a while?”  
  
“If it’s you, yeah. Cuz that usually means there’s a problem.”  
  
“Hah hah! Ryuji’s a dumbass! Never heard that one before!”  
  
He waved his hand in an exaggerated motion to punctuate the frustration he felt, which prompted the girl on the other line to audibly wince with that response. Despite it coming across as more of their arguing, there was a subtle hint of venom in his tone. It was usually a clear indicator to ease up and take his concerns seriously for a change. Ryuji could hear rustling in the background, and he could tell that Ann sat up as if they were in the same room.  
  
“Okay then. Real talk. What’re you thinking about right now?”  
  
A question he’s heard far too much recently. And all the variations that come with it. He tugged absent-mindedly at the collar of his white tank top.

“I dunno. I feel like I’ve been...what’s it called? Procrastinator?”  
  
“Procrastina _ting_ , but close enough.”  
  
“Yeah, that! Procrastinatin’ on what I wanna do. Do I just shut up and take another year at Shujin like a good boy? There’s so much shit buried underneath all the polish the school’s puttin’ up that I can’t really stand looking at it. But...it’ll make things easier on my Ma if I keep going there. Maybe get scouted by someone if the track team’s seriously coming back, y’know?”  
  
“Mhm. But that’s still a maybe at the end of the day. Is that what’s bothering you?”  
  
He half-nodded while clutching his knee. It’s like she’s staring right through him even though it’s just over the phone! The male briefly wonders if all girls have that kind of power before realizing that she’ll most likely hang up if he spaces out again.  
  
“Sorta. It feels like there’s too many maybes nowadays, Ann. Like I got all these plans and I kinda know what the endgame is, but it feels like everything I can try’ll just end up being a maybe.”  
  
Silence on the other end of the line. He didn’t expect an immediate response from her, after all. It was a heavy topic. But Ryuji thought that maybe he’ll be able to answer both of their questions with a question.  
  
“...when we were battling the Doc, back in the Garden. When we beat him, did a part of you regret breaking outta what he made for you?”  
  
He could hear a gasp on the other end. A light one, but a gasp nonetheless, which made Ryuji’s tired expression morph into something softer. Out of all the Thieves, Ann felt the most distraught over accepting Maruki’s reality and betraying what she discovered with Ren. And who could blame her? The guy was a crutch for her. It’s why she depended on him so much, why she wanted to succeed for his sake. Why she fell in love with him. To bring up that pain she inadvertently inflicted felt like a low blow for the delinquent, which made the apology roll off his tongue before he could realize it.  
  
“Fuck, Ann, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to-”  
  
“No! No, it’s fine. It’s… It’s a smart question. Especially smart for you.”  
  
Normally, he’d call bullshit considering her not-so-stellar academic performance, but he’ll give her a pass for his earlier blunder. She was trying to lighten the mood, after all. He lightly played with the strings of his basketball shorts whilst waiting in silence for her answer. After a minute or so, he got it.

“In the moment, yeah. I think I felt that way on instinct. Seeing everyone so happy in this new world was amazing. So to have to break that illusion and go back to the painful real world...it sucked. A lot.”  
  
Ann sighed, and he could hear more rustling in the background. Most likely her curling her knees up to her chest.  
  
“But then I remembered how we felt when we beat that evil god. Yalda...I’m not even gonna try. You get what I mean. Point is, when we beat him and stole the public’s heart...that was something we had to do. We gave everyone the chance to take their futures back, to have their own free will. Choice can be scary sometimes, Ryuji. But it’s better to be able to have that option instead of letting someone or something else do it for you, right?”  
  
...damn. When Ann got wise, she reeeeally got wise. Ryuji found himself slowly nodding with her words. Having the freedom of choice was something he never knew until he became a Phantom Thief. Until he chose to help those that were silently suffering just like he once did. Now, that same freedom of choice is what’s holding him back. Scaring him into thinking that every option is the wrong one. The only one who’s choosing to think like that is Ryuji himself. And he’ll be **damned** if he lets himself be led astray any longer.  
  
He found himself chuckling and quickly rushed to explain himself before Ann verbally tore him asunder.  
  
“Y’know, it’s weird having you be the smart one out of the two of us.”  
  
“Then if it’s so weird, why are YOU calling ME all the time?!”

He laughed again, this time much more raucous, which prompted Ann to start giggling on the other line as well. They both needed a few to calm down after their shared bout of humor, with Ryuji running a hand through his bleached blonde locks all the while.  
  
“Hehah...but, uh, seriously. Thanks. I totally get what you’re sayin’, and you’re right. I gotta stop letting all the damn ‘what if’ bullshit bother me all the time and just do what feels right. There’s still a lotta shit I gotta sort through, though.”  
  
Rather than immediately comment, Ann let out a thoughtful hum before breaking into an impish snicker. He knew it all too well. The one that spelled out DANGER in bright red warning lights.  
  
“I don’t like the sound of that.”  
  
“What it _sounds_ like is the fact that you need a quick strategy meeting to sort things through.”  
  
Strategy meeting? He wasn’t against it, but it was hard to get the old gang together again with recent events. Did she mean her and him? Yeah, that’s probably what she meant.  
  
“Oh, I mean, sure! When and where?”  
  
“Not with me, Ryuji.”

Ann didn’t want to meet? Then what did she mean by strategy meeting? ...oh! Like the ones they held in Leblanc! Which meant only one thing!  
  
“Ahhhh, I getcha. ...wait, but Ren’s gone now.”  
  
“Ryuji. _Who_ helped us get our shit together in the Palaces, again?”  
  
...oh. Getting their shit together in the Palaces?  
  
“...I don’t get it. How’s Futaba gonna be able to help?”  
  
“Ohmygod, **_Makoto_ ** , you idiot!”  
  
“Wh-”  
  
He felt himself choking on air before he could realize it, a hand desperately going to clutch the bedsheets and allowing the phone to tumble onto the mattress. Her mere name was enough to get the boy completely discombobulated. And Ann would have laughed at his blatant cluelessness were it not for the irritation that she felt at Ryuji missing her blatant hints.

Because Ryuji Sakamoto was as far from “subtle” as one could get. Especially when it came to his feelings. She picked up on it back in their middle school days, and it sure as shit carried over to their high school lives. It was easy to tell when he was attracted to a girl and not in his typically perverted ways. Sure enough, it developed the moment one Makoto Niijima, the Phantom Thieves’ strategist and analyst, manifested her Persona and never really went away since. From the warm glances he’d send her way during meetings to how he’d damn near shiver whenever she pulverized Shadows, the boy was smitten in every sense of the word.

It was hilarious to see how obvious he was, for a time. Then it just got annoying. Mainly because the dolt who normally didn’t get two shits about what he said or did could never get his act together around Makoto long enough to actually tell her. And while Ann may have put that on hold due to more pressing concerns, now was the absolute _best_ time to both help out her friend and play matchmaker at the same time!  
  
Though it was probably best to make sure he wasn’t dying, judging from how much he was coughing still.

“Ryuji, I know she gets you breathless but take it easy-”  
  
“SHUT UP ANN-”  
  
That outburst in particular got her cracking up, and she remained laughing until Ryuji finally caught his breath long enough for him to chew Ann out.  
  
“Wanna explain what the hell’s so funny?!”  
  
“You! It’s you! God, don’t choke like that when you go out with her tomorrow!”  
  
“Go out?! _TOMORROW?!”_

“Yes, tomorrow! The sooner the better, Ryuji!”  
  
Her tone became much more serious and almost chiding in nature, forcing the boy to pay close attention lest he get another scolding from the twin-tailed terror.  
  
“Everyone knows that Makoto’s gonna be working her ass off to get into some prestigious college that’ll be lucky to have someone like her. It’s only a matter of time before she gets accepted into one of them. And once she does, her free time’s gonna go down the drain. If you’re gonna shoot your shot, now’s the time. And besides, I bet she’ll wanna help you get your shit together if she knows it’ll benefit you and your education. Soooo…?”  
  
Jesus. Two for two tonight. Smart Ann is scary Ann. Ryuji opened his mouth to protest but ultimately came up with little more than a slack jaw. Because she was right on all accounts. Makoto only had a little bit of time before college season. Any free time she’ll have after that will be a blessing at best. And...perhaps it was his crush that he thought he had long since buried bubbling back to the surface, or Ann’s words inspiring some naive hope in his chest, or a combination of both. But for once, he felt like he knew exactly what he needed to do. No more maybes, just a clear cut answer in front of him.  
  
At this point, he just needed an outline. Guidance to help make his life mean something. But more importantly, he needed to make his feelings to her clear. He’s going to confess to Makoto goddamn Niijima. And he’ll be okay with any outcome at this point, as long as the air’s cleared between them. Who cares if she liked him back or not?

...well, Ryuji certainly did. A lot. Like holy shit it would be awesome if she liked him back. But he’s getting ahead of himself.  
  
“...I fuckin’ hate when you’re right.”  
  
“Taking that as a compliment.~ Now go! Shoo! Plan your date with her and get some rest! I expect all the details when it’s over!”  
  
“Alright, _alright,_ I got it! I can’t do that if you keep naggin’ me.”  
  
“I’ll stop if you thank me for being such a great wingmaaaan.”  
  
“Wingwoman! ...winglady? Winggirl? Ah, screw it!”  
  
They both erupted into a fit of laughter again, Ryuji holding his sides as he did so.  
  
“Hehe...thanks, Ann. Really. G’night.”  
  
“It’s no problem, Ryuji. You’re gonna kill it. Goodnight.”

Ryuji’s thumb grazed lightly on his phone’s screen when he tried to end the call, but Ann had already beaten him to the punch, leaving him in the relative silence of his room. She was always quick to jump the gun on these things...but her experience dating REN meant that she knew what she was talking about. If Ann can see potential with him and Makoto, then why couldn’t he?  
  
He went to his IM app and went to open a new chat with Makoto. His thumbs glided along the screen quickly, not wanting to lose his resolve now.  
  
**The QUEEN (Makoto)**

 _12:36 AM_ _  
_

Ryuji: heeeeeey prez

Ryuji: or ig i can’t really call you prez anymore huh lmao

Ryuji: so I sorta need ur help with shit for...my future

Ryuji: wanna hang tomorrow? we can grab a bite too if you wanna

There was so much wrong with his string of messages to Makoto that he wanted to bury his face between two pillows and sleep off his shame. He only got about halfway into that plan before he felt his phone buzz. Slightly shocked at her answering at this time of night, he held it tight in his hand, ready for the inevitable “Sorry, tomorrow doesn’t work, college stuff” type excuse to rear its ugly head.  
  
Except it never came. Ryuji felt a grin play at the corners of his lips with response. Maybe he actually will be able to sleep soundly tonight after all.  
  
**The QUEEN (Makoto)**

_12:39 AM_

Makoto: Hello, Ryuji. 

Makoto: It’s rather late to be asking for help with something so important.

Makoto: But I’ve been studying far too much recently. Shocking coming from me, right? So...

Makoto: Tomorrow sounds great. How about we meet at the diner on Central Street?

* * *

_Six minutes now. He didn’t stand me up, right? ...no. Ryuji wouldn’t be so inconsiderate of my time like this. Something must have come up. But what…?_ _  
_ _  
_ Makoto drummed her fingertips along the surface of the booth’s table, piercing red eyes scanning the entrance of the establishment for the umpteenth time that afternoon. Or maybe not. It certainly felt like an eternity, that much is for certain.  
  
Their plans were definitely last minute, she will concede. They had settled on meeting for a quick lunch (Ryuji mentioned needing brain food whenever he had to think on big things like this) before getting down to the nitty-gritty of the boy’s plans for the future. It seemed like an inconvenience at first, but as Makoto thought more about it...she ultimately looked forward to today. Perhaps giving Ryuji advice on the proper paths to take will in turn give her ideas for how to navigate her own future. Merely sitting around and waiting for college acceptance letters didn’t sit well with the Shujin alumni. Dread wasn’t the proper word to describe it, though. She had enough confidence in her academic performance and abilities to get into any college she so desired by her own merit. No, it was what would come after that proved to be difficult to wrap her head around.  
  
It was an inevitability that she would have to leave Tokyo in order to pursue her dream. Becoming a police commissioner is no small feat at the end of the day; moving away would be the least of her worries. Or so she thought, because the prospect of moving away made her more distraught than she could have ever imagined. Makoto was alone for a majority of her life, but the Phantom Thieves gave her a place to belong. A steadfast group of friends that she never would have met without the hardship she went through in the past year and a half.  
  
To say goodbye to all of that just to be alone at square one again...it made a pang ring through her heart. At the very least, she would have Sae. Something she would be ever grateful for, especially with their newly improved relationship following her escapades as a thief. But just because they got on better now doesn’t mean her workload decreased at all. Far from it; with her needing to put in overtime closing the book on the Shido case while transferring to her new career as a defense attorney, Makoto hardly saw her at home nowadays. And to be honest? She doubted things would change by the time she starts her first semester in the fall.  
  
That’s why she eagerly accepted the lunch with Ryuji. To finally feel a sense of familiarity even with their turbulent futures ahead of them. ...yes. That was totally the only reason for meeting with Ryuji.  
  
So why the hell was she so antsy about him being late for this? He was hardly ever punctual.

 _Even when we were thieves, he only ever showed up on time to less than half of our scheduled meetings._ _  
_ _  
_ ...wait. When did she have the time to take note of such an arbitrary detail? Makoto prided herself on her retention skills, but she didn’t keep track of the others’ timelines like that. What made Ryuji such a special case? True, she wrote him off as a troublemaker back before she got to know him, but it’s not like that carried over into their Phantom Thief work. And she did care for him as a friend and ally but-  
  
She didn’t have time to mull over her concern for the faux blonde, though. Mainly because the faux blonde in question burst through the diner doors with a start, attracting the attention/ire of the diner’s patrons. Ryuji was hunched against the doorframe, wheezing as a line of sweat dripped down his forehead. He looked as if he ran the whole way here! The dolt didn’t miss his train, did he?  
  
Makoto silently mouthed his name to herself and was on her feet in a moment’s notice. She underestimated Ryuji’s recovery, though, as he caught his breath enough to catch her with his brilliantly brown eyes and a wide, toothy grin. He started walking over to her spot with a hearty wave, leaving her to meekly and awkwardly wave back as if he _didn’t_ just bust open the diner’s front door like it was a Shadow’s face.  
  
“Yo! Sorry for the holdup. I was headin’ outta the station, right? About to cross the street, when I see this grandma strugglin’ with her groceries-”  
  
As Ryuji slid into the booth and rambled on about how a particularly familiar looking feline made off with one of the older woman’s cans of spam, Makoto felt the awkwardness from their meetup begin to fade away as a smile played on her lips. The ex-track star always had this boyish charisma about him that made it hard to not be captivated by whatever he said, no matter how absurd it could be. This story he was spinning was proof of that! Though that could be to his detriment sometimes, especially when they were Thieves. A double-edged sword, really.  
  
“-and then by the time I got back, I just noticed how late I was! So I booked it all the way over here. Crazy, huh?”  
  
The question snapped her out of her self-inflicted analysis on Ryuji, prompting the girl to blink in surprise before she could get a word.  
  
“Ah, yes. Crazy is definitely one way of describing it. Especially the part with the cat. Does it remind you of someone we know?”  
  
“Yeah! Ugh, it totally wouldn’t surprise me if Morgana put the damn furball up to it. Wait, d’ya think he can even talk to other cats?”  
  
“I’m...not sure if that’s how it works, Ryuji.”  
  
She put a hand over her mouth to stifle a chuckle, but failed when Ryuji’s own guffawing broke her concentration, resulting in muffled bursts of choking that looked like the younger Niijima sister was trying not to perform a spit take. This didn’t go unnoticed by her compatriot, who had slight difficulty trying to reign back his rowdy laughter but traded it for a small smirk.  
  
“You need a minute there, Prez?”  
  
“N- hah- No, I’m...I’m fine, no need to worry. Although, I vaguely remember you not wanting to call me that particular nickname anymore.”  
  
Normally, Makoto wouldn’t be so prudent about the various nicknames given to her _even though in hindsight, Shoulder Pads was still definitely something she harbored a grudge over even being mentioned._ It was definitely worth mentioning to see how Ryuji’s eyes bugged out, though.  
  
“Shit, I, uh, I- I didn’t mean it! Force of habit, y’know?”  
  
“Like with how often you curse? It’s fine, Ryuji. Call me whatever you feel comfortable with.”  
  
“Right. Got it, boss! Er, ma’am. Queen? ...nah, Makoto. Makoto’s good.”  
  
She raised an eyebrow with Ryuji’s constant flubbing of what to call her whilst her lips pursed into a thin line. He seems...anxious. Ryuji Sakamoto was hardly ever anxious about anything. So why was he stumbling over his words so often? Why did he keep bouncing his leg like that? And why is she paying so much attention to otherwise minute details?

“Ryuji.”  
  
Her voice was firm and unyielding, which did wonders in commanding his attention. And was it just her, or did he just shudder? Thinking it was better to not look too closely from here on out, she folded her hands into a tent on the table.  
  
“Why don’t we get down to business? We can save the idle chit-chat for after we help you figure out your path.”  
  
“Oh yeah! That! Here, one sec.”  
  
On cue, Ryuji began fishing through the pockets of his cargo shorts until he pulled out a small, folded piece of paper. Makoto watched him unfold it with an increasingly disbelieving expression, until the thing was similar in size to a map they would pillage during their Palace expeditions.  
  
“...wow.”  
  
That was the only word she could muster as her dark red orbs scanned the paper over. First things first, it was...messy. Disorganized would be putting it both nicely and lightly. What had started out as a Venn diagram (she could vaguely make out the word “Shujin?” written just above it) quickly devolved into disjointed lines connecting to other places on the chart- there was a section devoted to track, to part-time jobs, to physical rehab, to...it was like metaphorical spaghetti splattered across the paper. And to Ryuji? This diagram would probably make perfect sense, as evidenced by the proud grin he wore like a medal.  
  
To Makoto? Let’s just say that if she wore leggings today instead of jeans, the hand currently digging into her thigh would probably be drawing blood by now.  
  
But she wouldn’t let that show. This was progress for the boy! Before, it was clear from how he carried himself in battle that the runner didn’t give a damn about what lay ahead. He lived in the moment, more concerned about what’ll happen tomorrow than a couple months from now. This though? Despite its sloppy nature, this diagram showed that Ryuji was a lot more introspective and thoughtful than people gave him credit for. She half-hoped he would have a vague idea of what he wanted out of life going into this, but the chart here was an unexpected development yet a welcomed one.  
  
So Makoto allowed a gentle smile to form as he boasted about his creation.  
  
“Not bad, eh? I took a lotta time to figure out my priorities and what I need to narrow down. It ain’t super pretty, but-”  
  
“It suits you, Ryuji. I like it. Why don’t we order our food first, then you can walk me through what you have here?”

* * *

  
  
“So, let’s summarize what we talked about here.”  
  
“Right!”  
  
It had been about an hour, soon to be an hour and a half, since Makoto and Ryuji had arrived at the diner. And despite that time, it practically flew by as discussion began in earnest. The blonde seated across from her spoke with passion about his dilemma, which was probably the most surprising part about this whole talk. He had his occasional bouts of selfishness that slipped through the cracks, but one thing the analyst of the Phantom Thieves noticed was that the guy never wanted to burden people with his problems. That could typically be attributed to the Thieves having to deal with their neverending agenda, be it their targets’ change of heart to perform or their exploration of Mementos. However, even when they had moments of downtime, he was quick to brush off or downplay any of his failures or mistakes. His failing grades were treated as if they should be the standard, his own insecurities being runner-up to whatever doubts plagued his friends. It was noble of him to be so devoted to this ragtag group of theirs, yet it also hurt to see this good (albeit gruff) man not be selfish when he _needed_ to be.  
  
Which is why it was a welcome relief to her to see him open the floodgates and reveal what he had kept bottled up for so long. Because a particular moment of their conversation stood out to her the most.  
  
_“I’m scared, Makoto. Honest to god_ terrified _of what I’m gonna do from here.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Everyone is though, Ryuji. Fear of the unknown is commonplace in our generation.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Yeah, I know that much. But that don’t necessarily make it better. Like...when we were stealin’ hearts back then, I finally had a purpose. I always knew there was gonna be an endgame. Not everyone in the world is some shitty, corrupt adult. But for a while there...I was Skull, man. I felt like I was finally makin’ my mark by changing those scummy bastards’ hearts. I woulda been okay bein’ Phantom Thieves for another five, ten years! And now that it’s gone...I dunno. I wasn’t ready to go right back to being ‘that Sakamoto-kun’ again.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“You were proud of our work back then...but you also felt that it alone defined you. Is that right?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Maybe not it alone, but yeah. Pretty much. Kinda pathetic, ain’t it? Going from this big fuckin’ hotshot trying to change society to the loser asshole with no future.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“...you’re always so hard on yourself, did you know that?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Huh?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“I’ll be honest. I experienced something slightly similar after our battle with Maruki-sensei. That even after all the struggles and growth, that part of me that I worked so hard to purge would come back to the surface. The pushover Makoto Niijima, who was okay with turning a blind eye to injustice and wrongdoing if it meant guaranteeing my academic success.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Really? You always seemed like outta all of us, you had your shit together the most.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“I suppose that just means I did a good job of hiding it, then. Because it was hard to go day by day, diving headfirst into study guides for entrance exams and the like, without feeling like I was back at square one again.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“So what did ya do then?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“You’ll probably think it’s a little silly, but...remember how Ren left us with ‘memory boxes’, for each one of us?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Oh yeaaaah! With all our gear and crap in it! That dude was such a dork when it came to stuff like that.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Hehe, true. It’s definitely an unorthodox way of remembering the past. But our leader’s quirks aside, whenever I felt like I was close to losing my way these past few months, I would always open up that box again. Feeling the revolver in my palms, the brass knuckles against my fingers...I’d bring myself back to when I first discovered Johanna. When I swore to myself that I wouldn’t act out of anyone’s interests but my own and blaze my own trails moving forward.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“...it’s sorta like when I met the Captain for the first time. At first, I was really only focused on knockin’ Kamoshida down a peg. Get some revenge for everyone he ruined. But I think there was also a part of me that was_ done _with just being the problem kid. That I didn’t hafta follow anyone’s expectations but my own.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Exactly! It’s that self-discovery we went through that we need to be reminded of whenever we falter, Ryuji. Even if we slip back into our old habits from time to time, those are just momentary lapses. You know yourself better than anyone ever could.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Hah...when you put it like that, it actually makes a lotta sense.”_ _  
_ _  
_ It was clear to Ryuji now that his moments of indecisiveness weren’t a debilitating weakness. If you’re unable to make a choice because of all the options available to you, that is a MUCH better alternative than not making a choice because you literally are unable to. No corrupt adults or God of Control or counselors with savior complexes could tell him who he is or what he can do. He was free.  
  
So he folded his arms across his chest and leaned back against the booth, looking past their empty plates and glasses to make direct eye contact with Makoto. Her deep red eyes, normally stern and potentially unnerving to those on the business end of them, acted as a means of comfort for him, allowing him to speak his mind freely as he began to recount the plan they had drafted.  
  
“First up: gettin’ through another year at Shujin. It’ll suck at first, but I need to at least finish up with high school before I can worry about goin’ through rehab. Plus, Futaba’ll be going there this semester, so it won’t be so bad. ...hey, d’ya think we can convince Ann to come back too? We can have our own lil’ posse and-”  
  
“Ryuji! Focus!”  
  
“Shit! Sorry! Right, anyways. So while I go to Shujin, I gotta get some part-time work going. The airsoft place Ren got our gear from’ll work.”  
  
He almost chuckled, the thought of the resident delinquent going to work for a literal ex-yakuza playing in his head. But he didn’t feel like getting chewed out by Makoto for going on a tangent again, so he shook his head and continued.  
  
“And even though I look like a thug, I gotta improve my standin’ with the academy. So besides...ugh…”  
  
“ _Go on._ ”  
  
He didn’t have to look up to know that the former student council president’s eyes were boring into him, prompting him to continue.  
  
“Besides _studying more_ ...I’ll act as an advisor for the track team. They gotta be able to handle themselves, but I can at least offer advice to the first-years so they don’t gotta go through the same shit I did.”  
  
That made him smile wistfully. It would be weird to be referred to as Sakamoto-senpai to those select few, but it was also reassuring. He would do his damndest to fulfill his role to the best of his ability, to be as far from a Kamoshida or a Yamauchi as humanly possible. He may not have had a good role model back in the team’s early days, but that doesn’t mean the fresh meat this year had to experience the same.  
  
“And then once I graduate, I’ll use the money I earned to get my leg fixed up so I can get serious about track again.”  
  
“Good! And then you can go through college-”  
  
“To get my coaching degree and be the best track coach on the goddamn planet!”  
  
He clenched his hands into fists, unable to hold back his excitement at the prospect. His own track team, with passionate students able to find their place to belong, running side by side without any drama or bullshit weighing them down. It brought him a considerable amount of pride, knowing that Kamoshida and the academy may have failed its students when they needed it most, but he could stop the cycle here with his own power.  
  
He **would** stop the cycle here.  
  
His declaration left Makoto to clasp her hands together, outwardly pleased at his determination for his goals.  
  
“You’re certainly aiming high. It’s great to hear, though. So I take it that means you have no more doubts or worries about what to do from here?”  
  
“Nope! I’ve got a solid plan now, and it’s all thanks to you!”  
  
“Oh, stop it. You’re giving me too much credit. I helped a bit, but you’re ultimately the person who-”  
  
“No Makoto, seriously. I gotta thank you.”  
  
Ryuji’s sudden interruption of her brushing off his praise brought her to an abrupt halt then and there. The wide smile on his face dropped into something much deep, and he found himself reaching over the table to grasp one of his calloused hands over her own.  
  
“Truth is, I wonder what kinda guy I woulda turned out to be if I had someone like you in my life earlier on.”  
  
“Ryuji…?”  
  
His tone was practically somber as he spoke, and though she found herself unexpectedly tensing with how he grasped onto her hands...she didn’t move to remove them from his hold. Where did all of this come from?  
  
“I, uh...sorta lied earlier. There’s one more thing I’m worryin’ about as far as my future’s concerned...and it’s being able to spend it with you.”  
  
The heat flooding to Makoto’s face was equally hope AND anxiety inducing for Ryuji, which prompted him to keep speaking before he lost his nerve here.  
  
“I’m just gonna come clean, alright? I like ya, Makoto. A hell of a lot. When you first joined back with Kaneshiro, I just thought it was a dumbass crush that woulda went away after a week or two. But weeks turned into months and then I realized...this ain’t just a crush. I wanna be yours.”  
  
Her lips were opened in a small “o” shape, and it was hard to resist the urge to move one of her hands out from underneath Ryuji’s to cover it up. Makoto had noticed the signs; of course she did, she wasn’t blind! How could she have ignored those longing looks or the way he practically shrunk whenever they got in close proximity to each other? Yet, she knew next to nothing about romance, so she didn’t register the weight those actions of his held.  
  
But having friends like Ann and Ren made her experience new things. And with this new information, what was made glaringly obvious was how idiotic she was for not capitalizing on it sooner. But more than that…  
  
“Why me though?”  
  
They were polar opposites. She had long since discarded titles like delinquent or honors student, yes, but they still had wildly different personalities. He was loud and brash, she was quiet and reserved. She always found herself studying, he was found doing anything _but._ He was carefree and she was a perfectionist.  
  
So...was it true then? The age-old adage of opposites attracting?  
  
“See, if it were the other way around, I would totally ask that too.”  
  
She didn’t have much time to make excuses before Ryuji took the reins once more, now moving his hand from on top of hers to rest limply on the table.  
  
“Cuz I could totally get why anyone in your boat would say no. I mean, look at me. But weren’t you the one that just said I’m hard on myself? At the end of the day, there’s a lot to like about you, Makoto. You can kick serious ass, but also are able to get straight A’s when you do it. You’re reeeeally pretty, not just hot; like Yusuke really oughta use _you_ as a model and not Ann. But at the end of the day, you’re one of us. A good person with a good heart. So why would it be anyone but you?”  
  
What were all these feelings bubbling in her chest? Makoto wasn’t sure if she should smack him for saying something so brash about her appearance or swoon at his assessment of her character. Is this what Ryuji felt for all this time? This pent-up shower of emotions that culminated in a desire, a need to be cared for, wasn’t unfamiliar to her. Her formerly strained relationship with her sister had that same desire in the familial sense. All she ever wanted, no matter who it was she found herself with, was to feel accepted. Like she mattered. She had worth as a person.  
  
She may have initially found that with her fellow Thieves. But if she were to pursue this with Ryuji...she could have that and so much more. With someone that she considered to be a good man, a man that felt as she did.  
  
And that made her choice clear.  
  
“...listen, you don’t gotta feel pressured into sayin’ yes. It’ll hurt, but I’ll get it. I just wanted to get that offa my chest so I don’t have any more regrets.”  
  
“Ryuji. Come sit next to me, please.”  
  
The request made him do a double-take, as if he was already prepared to be rejected despite the effort it took to finally air out his attraction for her. His eyes were wide with the prospect, but the light hue tainting his cheeks was a clear sign that he was more than willing to comply with her.  
  
“Uh...s-sure.”  
  
So he got to his feet, which served to make Makoto scoot slightly to her right to give him room. And after a brief moment of awkwardly shuffling next to her, the two former Thieves found themselves shoulder to shoulder in the booth.  
  
She had seen Ann get clingy with Ren in some of their meetings, so it wasn’t too hard to figure out just what exactly she had to do here. Which is why after a brief moment to ensure he was settled and relaxed, she went to lightly peck his cheek before resting her head against his shoulder.  
  
“I...I hope that’s an obvious enough answer for you…”  
  
For a split second, Ryuji’s fingertips went to brush against where Makoto’s lips just were. It felt unreal, an almost imperceptible action that he would normally brush off as his own imagination. But no...this was reality. The reality that Makoto Niijima, their resident Queen, actually reciprocated what he thought he would never receive.  
  
Were it not for their close proximity, he would have let out a hearty cheer and practically screamed to the sky about how he’s been blessed with a girlfriend like Makoto. But he’ll gladly settle for going to plant a kiss to her forehead, a blissful smile dominating his expression and remaining there for the rest of the evening.  
  
“Yeah. Plenty obvious.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! It's been a hot minute since I've posted but this was an opportunity that would have been foolish to pass by. Kudos and comments are appreciated!


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